Today, what can i say about today............................ It does indeed surprise me how quickly time passes.. It seems that many forget or more correctly they don't remember as often as i. Even husbands it seems forget more easily than the wife.....Which is all normal i suppose.....
Today, 2 years ago today my life changed forever..
2 years ago today i found out just how strong i really am.....
2 years ago today my husband walked out of Meijers with a beautiful purple calla Lilly plant (i had admired them for years) telling me that i didn't need to walk into my home empty handed.....
2 years ago today at about this time actually i delivered my little baby angel already in heaven with the lord...
For the past 2 years not one single day has passed that i don't think of you Ian Thomas..
For 2 years not one day has gone by that i don't reach for the silver heart around my neck...........
For 2 years i have wondered if you would have looked like your brother or maybe your sister or if you would have had red hair......
On this day for the past 2 years i am once again back in that hospital room holding you............
And as always on this day i sit here crying and looking at my newly purchased Calla Lilly thankful to the lord for my time feeling you grow inside me kicking me.........................
Welcome to my life
- Janet's page
- I'm a 30 something mostly stay at home mom with 3 children and an amazing husband!! Along with a small furry farm and a bunch of fish.
6 comments:
I'm so sorry !
I hope for you much comfort today.
Wow, that just brought me to tears. 2 years ago. WOW. I am so sorry for your loss. Please pray for Eric's 2nd cousin, she just lost her baby at 38 weeks. My heart goes out to her and you.
That's about the saddest thing I've read in years and years and years years and years!!!!!! Now I'll go blow my nose:(
I do remember now. I guess I just don't know the details of this story. Just that you lost a little one way too early.
I'm sorry Janet.
It's not something I want to relive in written word, it's hard enough when i think about it all-the-time.. Honestly that pregnancy didn't sit well for me right from the start, shouldn't have gotten pregnant in the first place according to my cycle, to many days past "the day". About 1/8th of an inch of the cord(closest to baby) didn't develop correctly so once demand was greater than supply he died. I even know the day he died but my mind convinced me otherwise, it was actually his last movement before he passed:( Then I was so busy and just "chose" to feel all was fine I didn't worry and had an ultrasound 2days later, I even knew it on the screen but once again my mind blocked it...
THE hardest part of it all was waiting for labor to start, I woke up every few hours during the night because I was bawling, EACH AND EVERY TIME!!!
I also got pregnant with Ari WAY TO SOON after and bleed every day from week 6 to 13 or 15(don't remember exactly) and it was awful! I was in for ultrasound's every week for so long. Should have known back then how stubborn he was going to be!! :-)
Oh geeze Janet. That makes me sick reading that.
So how far along were you when you lost him ?
do you wanna just email me :) that way we don't have to fill up your archives with Q&A time.
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